When complimenting, be delicate and sincere, do not cause misunderstandings – Illustration: Getty
1. sarcastic compliments
Innocent compliments can be complicated if they contain other meanings.
For example, you may be amazed at the good deeds of others. Or you use a sexist, racist stereotype.
Even if you mean well, there are things you should think twice before you say them.
2. “You’re on time today!”
This sentence, which is thought to be a compliment, has the opposite effect if it is for someone who is a latecomer.
You mean to say that being late is normal for the other party.
3. “You look younger with this new hairstyle!”
If you’re not careful, you risk pointing out that people used to look very old. Just keep praising simple. Don’t be too detailed or flashy.
4. “You’re strong!”
When a friend is having a hard time, we want to show that we believe in the other person’s ability to overcome adversity.
But saying that only makes people remember the current bad situation even more.
Moreover, sometimes people don’t want to be “strong”. Or they feel more and more useless because they do not have enough willpower and capacity to handle problems.
5. “You’re a good driver, aren’t you!”
This type of praise is easily perceived as implicitly sexist.
It also has many variations, and is considered an implicit insult to others. “Being a mother, your figure is so beautiful”; “You don’t go to college, but you’re smart.”
You do not need to attach any ideas before the word “that” in the above sentence pattern.
6. “You are absolutely beautiful!”
Be careful because commenting on the appearance of someone you’re not too close to – like a coworker, casual acquaintance, or a stranger – can make them uncomfortable or even harassed.
Of course, it depends on the situation.
7. “I’m so proud that you got a raise this year”
The type of complimenting the achievements of a lover or husband and wife is easy to create the opposite effect. Your partner may think you see him as a cash machine.
8. “You look great for your age!”
Do you mean to say, they are not pretty in general, just look good for their age.
Skip the age segment, simply compliment them on how awesome they are.
9. “You’re so pretty, why are you still single?”
No single lady likes to be told her lonely identity forever. Such a statement not only implies that they are poor old aunts, it also implies that they have “problems” without a lover.
The rule here is not to discuss someone else’s dating or marriage status, unless the person mentions it himself.
10. “You’re so pretty, you should smile more”
What you’re really saying is: “Cheer up, you forbidding. I’m having fun, and you should be happy with me too”.
This sentence is usually said by men to women. It can also be translated as the girl who doesn’t act cute and cheerful to please a guy.
Remember, you can’t control other people’s moods. To make them smile, tell a funny story or give a sincere compliment.
11. “Oh, you lost so much weight, you’re not fat anymore!”
Weight is a sensitive topic for many people. You should not arbitrarily comment on the body shape and weight of others, even if you have goodwill.
You should wait to see if the other person wants to bring up the issue.
12. “Your girlfriend is so pretty!”
Complimenting a friend’s lover’s looks usually doesn’t have a happy ending. Obviously you are looking and comparing. Complimenting is like saying “You’re so pretty, but you fall in love with him”.
Safer, you should compliment them on finding a good person, that special someone, or just admire their romantic love.