Psychology: In the workplace, people who are too sensitive will find it difficult to go far, those who react more slowly will advance

I know a girl named America, she graduated from university 2 years ago, but the number of times she changed jobs was not less than 6, 7 times, and the reason for resigning is not a big deal.

Once, she accidentally heard her boss evaluate her like this: “Miss America looks a bit silly…”, but before she finished speaking, she sadly left, from then on forever. in heart.

Another time, the boss was upset inside. At the right time, America was called into the office to get documents. Because the boss’s emotions have not yet been stabilized, he accidentally dropped the document on the ground due to excessive force. The sensitive American thought it was because her boss was not satisfied with her, so she felt very uncomfortable in her heart, so she decisively resigned immediately after.

The same goes for some follow-up work. Also because she was too sensitive, she resigned time and time again.

Through this story, you have probably also seen how sensitive Ms. America is, just a few evaluations from her boss can pull her feelings down the cliff. At the same time, her thoughts are also quite negative, stubbornly thinking that her boss’s behavior is like that because she doesn’t like her.

Psychology: In the workplace, people who are too sensitive will find it difficult to go far, the slower the person who reacts, the more they will advance - Photo 1.

Such sensitive people often have a heart so fragile and fragile as glass, they cannot withstand criticism or accusations, even a mere assessment. Sensitive people often have the following three characteristics:

1. Sensitive, negative

Sensitivity does not come entirely from the outside world, but also related to one’s own personality and inner self. American psychologist Arthur Aaron said: “People who are highly sensitive to subtle changes in their surroundings are responsive, and they like to think deeply.”

This means that people with sensitive hearts will be very sensitive to changes around them, and react to them, and if this reaction is negative, they will easily fall into a state of sadness.

Therefore, in the workplace, it is easy for them to unilaterally think that their boss is criticizing them or self-criticizing before others criticize and take all the blame for themselves…

2. Emotional reactions are fluctuating and persistent

People with a glass heart are fast emotionally and are easily influenced by others and their surroundings. Once there is a stimulus or change, they will immediately feel emotional, maybe very happy for a second, then extremely sad, fall into negative emotions and can’t calm down for a while. long.

In the workplace, they easily turn around or cry on the spot just because of a certain statement.

3. Lack of self-confidence, as well as difficulty building self-confidence

Self-efficacy, coined by the famous American psychologist Bandura, refers to an individual’s confidence in whether they can use their own skills. to complete a certain task or not.

People with glass hearts are often vulnerable, perhaps because they were rejected so much in their childhood, that they gradually became convinced that they were incompetent.

In addition, one or two successes cannot convince them to believe in their own abilities, but they will attribute various reasons to external factors, such as luck or chance.

In the workplace, sensitive people often do not believe that they can complete a certain project, so they are often not actively in charge of the project, leading to promotion in the workplace that can be delayed.

Psychology: In the workplace, people who are too sensitive will find it difficult to go far, the slower the person who reacts, the more they will advance - Photo 2.

The opposite of being sensitive is being less sensitive. The phrase “the power of insensitivity” was coined by the famous Japanese writer Junichi Watanabe. It’s the opposite of being sensitive, but it doesn’t mean stupid either. It emphasizes a kind of ability to endure hardship, an attitude, wisdom in life and calmness in the face of setbacks and pain in life, firmly moving forward in one’s own direction. me. It is “the means and wisdom to win a good life”.

Compared with sensitive people, less sensitive people are more likely to survive in fiercely competitive and complex workplace environments, and to achieve inner balance and live harmoniously with others.

So how can we enhance this kind of “insensitive capacity” for ourselves?

1. You don’t have to take all the responsibility yourself

The quality of a project is not determined by one person. If you make some mistake, but then other people don’t notice it, then they are also partly responsible for that mistake.

We need to strive for perfection, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make mistakes. Project members should also monitor and actively communicate with each other to ensure quality and efficiency.

Psychology: In the office, people who are too sensitive will find it difficult to go far, the slower the person who reacts, the more they will advance - Photo 3.

2. Accurately select the evaluations of colleagues and superiors, depending on the job

We do not need to over-analyze the words of others, exaggerating their criticism to negate our own. We need to be open to criticism, confront ourselves, and take this opportunity to reflect on ourselves.

3. Keep Mindfulness

The term “mindfulness” originated in Buddhism and was later developed into a systematic psychotherapy. Mindfulness is knowing clearly what arises in every moment of the present, here and now. Mindfulness is being aware of what is and is happening, but without making any judgment, analysis or reaction to it, but simply observing and paying attention to it.

When faced with criticism from others, let’s try not to react emotionally, but listen carefully. If the other person is a grumpy person who has a bad attitude towards us, but doesn’t really do us any harm, then we should also try to be mindful and non-judgmental and react to it. Only then, our emotions are not easily influenced by others and have bad fluctuations.

Sometimes, if we let the other person feel our agitated response, they will most likely feel more excited and more critical. If we don’t react emotionally, but just listen quietly, when they don’t get what they want, they will automatically reduce their aggressive behavior, this in psychology is called “quenching”. ” (extinction).

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