Why do we hurt when we post pictures with few likes, text messages and no one responds?

Elon Musk, CEO of Tesla, in a program once said: “One of the problems with social media that many people point out, especially with Instagram, is that people seem to have a much better life than they really are. People only post photos when they’re really happy or when they’ve been edited. Even without editing, they will at least choose the photos with the best light and angles to post. Basically, people look better and happier than they do in real life.”

Why do we hurt when we post pictures with few likes, text messages and no one responds?  - Photo 1.

It is a fact that, in life, no one wants to be left behind. So on social media, we show others our best, even if it’s not realistic.

Whether you realize it or not, you and many others are putting a lot of time and effort into taking care of your profile so that it looks its best and perfect. The formation of this alternate self also depends a lot on how others are projecting themselves or in other words, you will be very focused on the evaluation and perception of those around you.

In psychology, there is a term related to this called the Spotlight Effect.

This effect has been described as an overestimation of how much other people pay attention to oneself in awkward or undesirable situations. In the 4.0 era, social networks set unnecessary standards for people. Young people and even the elderly feel as if they need the approval of the whole world before doing anything.

Why do we hurt when we post pictures with few likes, text messages and no one responds?  - Photo 2.

People seem to care more about what others think of them than what they feel about themselves. If someone posts an issue that is not approved by society, they will feel like they are incompetent and small, unpopular and unimportant in this life.

The human brain has always been trained to target “favorites”, but they can also become a danger on social networks.

Daria Kuss, an associate professor of psychology at Nottingham Trent University in the UK, says getting a bunch of hearts/likes or a few flattering comments on a photo, a quote or a post. Being on social media activates the reward system of the brain, thereby creating a brief moment of happiness.

Over time, the brain gradually forms associations between social media messages and pleasant experiences. This explains why you actively seek out that feeling again and create a cycle: post, wait for a response, get a reward (joy) and repeat.

Gregory Serapio-García, a PhD student at the University of Cambridge, studying how social networks predict personality traits, said: “The reactions on social media are like an exaggerated and exaggerated version of the real process that you will experience firsthand. You get notifications from different people, instant gratification, but that’s not the case.”

That happiness, though extremely short, is still the driving force that makes social network users return to the starting point of the process. Daria Kuss says: “They want to seek more than recognition. As a result, they spend more time on social media and in finding content to ensure that their social media pages are regularly updated.”

So, if you find yourself in a situation like: posting a picture of your vacation on Instagram but getting very few likes, writing a blog on LinkedIn but almost no one comments on it, sending a message on WhatsApp with “positive thinking” content for your colleagues but with very little response, you will feel frustrated, depressed, hurt, even angry and irritable.

You will feel inferior and worthless in the eyes of others and over time can lead to other medical conditions. Social media is the catalyst for such reactions. The more you get caught up in that grip, the more dependent on the emotions social media brings, the harder it will be for you to break free.

Why do we hurt when we post pictures with few likes, text messages and no one responds?  - Photo 3.

Ask yourself the question: Whose life is this and who are you living for? Does it really make sense to seek validation from others? Do you think everyone in this world has time to focus on what you post or write on social media? The truth is no. Everyone’s life is a journey, so you can’t please everyone. The higher the expectation, the greater the disappointment.

Social media is not real life, so what our eyes see is not necessarily true. As Elon Musk said: “Actually, people who you think are extremely happy are actually not. There are people among them, deep inside they are really depressed and sad. And the truth is that no one is perfect. That is true in all cases no matter who you are.”.

Your happiness doesn’t need to be defined by what other people think of your accomplishments. We must understand what makes us happy, full of radiance and enthusiasm. Enlightenment is a journey, not a destination. Every challenge and difficulty in life is a learning experience.

Theo: Michigandaily, Psychcentral, Ylhsthewrangler, Thehindu, Vice

footerFbSdk.init(); });

Leave a Comment